Once upon a time in a straight and square suburb of Chicago, a young stud was growing up and slowly discovering his awesome man-magnet powers. Tommy Defendi could feel his strength grow in his rock-hard bone and knew that one day he would have to take its awesome butt-slicing dominance to the big screen. Tommy eventually packed up and waved goodbye to Illinois and headed for fun in the sun, in Florida, where muscly dudes and rollerblading twink-boys flooded the boardwalks in search of some...